ok i guess i'm feeling a bit better now.

but i miss school! ahahaha.
no wait. i miss my FRIENDS in school. yup that's it.
especially ESTHER. ahahahaha.
the nice person who tries so hard to counsel me when i'm sad or when i cry.
although it doesn't really work. =)
awww so sweet. thank you!
never had a nicer friend. =)
but come to think of it, counselling me seems to make her feel a bit down too.
i think even sitting down beside me when i'm drowning in my own sorrows does so.
SORRY. i really am. don't feel bad, okay? =)

oh yeah and i've been feeling really sick and tired for the past few days.
i'm trying my hardest to cry.
that seems to be the only way to express my feelings. but only to empty space. no one else.
but it's not working.
i've pleaded God to help me cry so many times but i just couldn't do it.
maybe i've cried too much on wednesday?
i don't know.
someone must help me cry sooner or later.

and i broke my promise.
to a certain 2 people.
i'm so sorry..
i can't believe that it's only one day into the term break and i'm breaking my promise.
actually, i don't even think the term break started yet.
anyway.
i even told myself that i'm going to stop doing it FOR GOOD.
and look at what i just did?
i'm a horrible, HORRIBLE person.
i'm REALLY REALLY sorry..
please forgive me?
but trust me, i felt really bad right after i did it.
and it's really hurting to look at it, touch it and think about it.
i just let 2 of my friends down.

i'm the most despicable person you've ever seen in your whole entire life.
just say it.
trust me.