ok it has been more than one week since i last posted. so i will post now. =D
anyway.
there's a lot of homework today. the teachers have officially gone siao. first day of the week then still give so much homework. then there's the anticipation for our tests which i'm probably going to fail. and to top it all, my mood has been changing so fast lately that i can feel siao one moment and crappy the next.
there's something wrong with me.
come to think of it, there's always been something wrong with me all this while.
and art is so freaking hard to do. i've been cutting it like siao and part of it is going to drop off already. maybe i've been drawing the lines too closely. anyway, i'm still quite confused about the whole paper cut thing. mr leow keeps explaining to me and until now i still don't get the whole thing.
crap.
i told you there was something wrong with me.
and i keep feeling like crying. like over small matters. and its mostly small matters. although i can't remember any big ones. oh well. like my friend gets angry with me and i start crying when i get back to my classroom. note: this is real, not just an example.
i don't know. i think i'm like quite frail or something. maybe i treasure friendships a lot. so if there's only a LITTLE controversy, i can get very upset over it. the point is, until now, i still don't have i real best friend whom i can share all my thoughts with. even within my group of friends in 2a2, i still don't feel that safe. i don't even feel really safe with my 3 best friends from primary school. maybe it's because i don't have any real best friends that i treasure my current friendships a lot, even if they are not that close. maybe it's because i think these groups of friends that i have now can disappear any moment. then i'll be left with no one but God, which is actually all i need. but i still need friends on this earth, this standby place before i go to heaven, right?
God, please help me.
anyway.
there's a lot of homework today. the teachers have officially gone siao. first day of the week then still give so much homework. then there's the anticipation for our tests which i'm probably going to fail. and to top it all, my mood has been changing so fast lately that i can feel siao one moment and crappy the next.
there's something wrong with me.
come to think of it, there's always been something wrong with me all this while.
and art is so freaking hard to do. i've been cutting it like siao and part of it is going to drop off already. maybe i've been drawing the lines too closely. anyway, i'm still quite confused about the whole paper cut thing. mr leow keeps explaining to me and until now i still don't get the whole thing.
crap.
i told you there was something wrong with me.
and i keep feeling like crying. like over small matters. and its mostly small matters. although i can't remember any big ones. oh well. like my friend gets angry with me and i start crying when i get back to my classroom. note: this is real, not just an example.
i don't know. i think i'm like quite frail or something. maybe i treasure friendships a lot. so if there's only a LITTLE controversy, i can get very upset over it. the point is, until now, i still don't have i real best friend whom i can share all my thoughts with. even within my group of friends in 2a2, i still don't feel that safe. i don't even feel really safe with my 3 best friends from primary school. maybe it's because i don't have any real best friends that i treasure my current friendships a lot, even if they are not that close. maybe it's because i think these groups of friends that i have now can disappear any moment. then i'll be left with no one but God, which is actually all i need. but i still need friends on this earth, this standby place before i go to heaven, right?
God, please help me.
